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Covid, Lockdown and its Effect On You

posted on #1
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It’s weird. On the one hand, for me Covid is just something that has happened to other people. My job is 100% home based and, bar a month being reduced to a three-day week, life has largely carried on as normal for me. Except for various personal circumstances that have transpired but they have nothing to do with the pandemic, just Covid made it far harder than it needed to be.

But, with all this enforced time on my hands, I’ve managed virtually nothing. I could’ve spent a lot of this time really getting to work on some areas of my drumming that really need it and I want to achieve. But each day instead aimlessly blurred into the next and each day I got slightly more frustrated with myself for managing to do nothing. My mojo for music (and practically everything else) just seemed to evaporate. As if the whole situation had thrown me into an existential crisis.

I presume I’m not the only person to have suffered total and complete apathy throughout this utter mess.

Anyone else suffered with this sense of ‘what’s the point?’ It’s frustrating mentally for me because I know, in the scheme of things, I’m damn lucky to be where I am - none of what’s hurting people out there has come to my door, be it health or work - and shouldn’t feel so utterly lethargic by it all.

How have people dealt with it? Have you ‘suffered’ similar things where you have utterly failed to achieve anything despite this being the perfect opportunity - in some ways - to knuckle down and get it done?
If you make a mistake, do it again and make it look like you meant to do it!
posted on #2
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It DOES influence motivation most definitely. Had a distant husband of a relative come down with it(First incident in my circle). He has COPD also, his Oxygen was 83 (nearly terminal I am told).. they didn't think he was gonna make it. Last resort they gave him plasma twice, and he now is being weaned off the oxygen and is out of ICU. He lost 30 pounds in one week.

I guess what I have difficulty with is situations here, like entering a restaurant...where a mask is required, but once you get in you can take the mask off to eat and drink. If there's some logic to that, someone can feel free to explain that to me:|

Keep your chin up Martin. You are one helluva drummer, but I am glad you see improvement in yourself and keep working towards your goals..<3

IMHO..I think you should get used to the Covid deal...I don't think it will ever go away. All it takes is one lone wolf to spark it up again.
posted on #3
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Hey Mark sorry to hear about your friend. glad he is doing better👍 I am supposed to go to Mass. to see my dad. Not for Covid , but kidney cancer. he's having an operation the 23rd, .Now because my parents are elderly and don't go out, to not catch covid. they said I should stay home in case I get it on the way there. But hope all goes well for my dad . I hate not being there cause you never know.
posted on #4
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Yeah.. the toll this is taking on people is enormous. I hope everything works out well for your dad. I have to wonder how it's going to affect kids being out of a social environment. If I was a software engineer Id be developing a program to monitor kids schooling On Line:)
posted on #5
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mpointon - I think I've had similar struggles with certain things. On one hand, the pandemic, and entire lock-down and work-from-home scenario has brought me to this site. I'm really enjoying being "creative" again. Shit, I just ordered a new guitar because I'm having so much fun jamming right now...lots of great musicians on here, and lots of "creative output" opportunities. It's been a great diversion from all the chaos out there, pandemic, protests, CA fires, and this sorta general divide in humanity...etc...

I am over-worked at the moment (I work in IT)...I'm tired, worn-out. Our department wasn't setup to scale for remote support and telecommuting. Frustration is high and it's taking a physical and psychological toll on me. My eating habits have been horrible during this time. I sit more and move less. This whole thing has created a very unhealthy environment. But that's not an excuse for me...I mean, I should be going out there, walking, working-out, or something...but I'm not. That also adds to my frustration.

It's been a ying and yang effect for me...I'm growing musically, but feel like I'm failing in other areas, and lacking motivation.

Just wanted to let you know you're not alone in your thinking. We'll get through this, chin up and smile :)
posted on #6
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To rootshell = Great thoughts! it's a S**t show out there fer sure....a well planned & organized chaos festival...best of wishes for you friend....I feel your frustration....

“Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body.”
― Lucius Annaeus Seneca
Edited by Major 3rd on September 13 2020 14:22
posted on #7
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mpointon wrote:
How have people dealt with it? Have you ‘suffered’ similar things where you have utterly failed to achieve anything despite this being the perfect opportunity - in some ways - to knuckle down and get it done?

I've read Martins initial post quite a while back and have been wondering how to react ever since.
I have dealt with total-absence-of-any-motivation phases during depressed episodes (not offering a diagnosis to anyone here), so what you describe does seem familiar to me.
I can also relate to this odd feeling of "It hasn't hit me in any notable way, why does Covid affect me, mentally?", but instead of waiting out the situation more or less passively, I have intentionally used the different phase to dive into new challenges, such as rebuilding our barn or starting archery (now, that's something recommendable that's got that motivation appeal).
Again, I share your situation as I also work in IT, do not have to fear loosing my job anytime soon. I'd consider us well off, but I also feel a great mental impact of what has been going on.
What I have been noticing about myself is that I communicate less openly, first of all to prevent people from dumping their negative emotions or dominant opinions on me, and secondly because I feel I might end up saying something that might not fit my audiences reality. So, I've chosen to remain silent and busy myself with the things at hand, which has worked quite well for me, so far.

Now, what has been bothering you, and what does bother me, too is the question of how/why the whole covid situation seems to have an impact on our mental state, which can not be rooted down to "we feel that way because our individual life has just dramatically changed, and that change is directly linked to some appearance of the covid disease in our immediate surroundings".

I do believe this impact is happening, and Martins initial post kind of prooves my gutfeeling.
I believe the phenomenon is much more interesting to talk about then discussing covid itself or current politics, and I'd dare say that the psychological effects of covid on the general public will quite soon (economically) outrun the direct effects of the virus and people being infected.

I'm no expert on traumatic experiences, but I believe the whole lockdown thing might turn out to leave quite a number of people changed from who they were before, and if one imagines the different levels of being affected from "I cought the covid virus myself" at the very top,
to maybe "I lost my job because nobody needed my service during the lockdown, and I had to change career paths" in the middle,
and a large group of people (including me) who belong into the "There was no immediate effect on my life except having to wear a mask in the grocery store, but I had that feeling that things were never going to be the same again" at the bottom of that pyramid.
What I'm trying to say is this:
While it is a very immediate experience to have to survive a dangerous infection,
and a rough ride having to invent oneself once more as one struggles to find a different field to work in, one should not under-estimate the amount of stress created by the rather unclear task of preparing for a change whichs demands have not even materialized in ones surroundings. Something inside of us feels a change is coming, and to those of us who have been as un-affected as Martin and me, we might worry that travelling overseas might be more complicated or expensive in the future, or huge music festivals might not continue to exist after covid (luxury problems in the eyes of people who are really affected, I'm aware of that!), and that really shouldn't cause a lot of distress one might think.
But it does, not because we couldn't live with travel restrictions and no festivals, but because we don't know what else we'll have to let go of.
So, uncertainty is one source of distress.
Want another one?
How about: Most of us had to realize what we do is of little value in the face of a crisis like covid. In the hardest lockdown conditions we witnessed here in germany, it seemed only hospital personel, amazon delivery drivers and grocery supplies workers were needed to keep this country going, leaving the rest of people with a unique hands-on experience of "what I do is completely useless when things get tough". That thought might have been quite new to quite a lot of people, and it does add to feeling stressed if you feel your service falls under optional things.
Usually, you can observe how hard it is for people to realize that the world will keep turning without them when they go into retirement, and it's quite common people have a hard time adjusting to that, even tho their date of retirement has been known to them years ahead.
Covid just send quite a large group of people onto the "you are useless now"-bench without any prior warning, so there should be little surprise people react in a similar way.

As you can tell, I feel it is not only worthwhile, but maybe even necessary to eventually overcome this crisis to talk about the emotional and psychological effects of covid.

If I hear the news that the cologne philharmonic orchestra is allowed to perform again, with the restriction that only 1000 people may attend in the auditorium (that's maybe 20% of what can be seated there), to then read that only 300 people actually showed up to see the show,
then I get the feeling we better prepare to see some things go for good, or only return to a smaller degree once all restrictions are lifted.
There will be no other but psychological reasons for these effects... and I'm not convinced things will snap back to "normal".

Last, let me include a very smart, short explanatory video on depression - if you have ever wondered if what you feel is a depression, you might be able to tell after watching this, so share this whenever you feel someone might benefit from it.
posted on #8
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I was also thinking about both Martin's and now Dick's posts. And I'm also working in IT (from home since mid March), and so I consider myself also as one of the lucky ones, while some neighbours are on short-term employment now, or even lost their jobs. Not to mention those who were directly affected and got ill.

So yes we're talking about some kind of 'luxury problem' for some of us, still this whole thing is strange, and I also suffered from the mentioned things and was also really down for a while, mood wise.

But at this point I wanted to also mention Wikiloops and the positive effect this has on me. I know this isn't the purpose of this site, but I'm really looking forward to finding new music here each day, new members, and a friendly comment or two from other users and from the team.

So I think we're still the lucky ones - we don't have to sit at home passively, waiting this all out, no we can actually *do* something nice, make music together, cheer each other up in case someone is having a bad day or so, and as I wrote elsewhere lately (and some member thanked me for that already), we can try to not only see our own navels, we can try to understand, and to help, and at least be kind to each other - that costs us nothing but could mean a world of a difference to others who might need it.

Be kind - isn't that what the doctor (Doctor Who) ordered as well?

Again: though it's not the main purpose of Wikiloops, this cheers me up immensely. I just love being here - and I hope that we can help each other with just being here and doing what we love anyway. So a big thumbs up to Martin, Dick, and all others who are here and who are making - at least *my* - days a bit better.

Or, as another user said yesterday in the Shoutbox, I love you all!

posted on #9
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I'm going to make a guess (the scientist in me wants to say hypothesis...but it's not): Covid is the first occurrence since WW II that has had a major global effect. At that time it was a matter of people fighting people. One side would win, one side would loose...life would go on. Most of those people are no longer among us. Their reality of a world wide phenomenon that controlled nearly everything is long gone. So this is something new to our collective consciousness. However, (here comes the guess) we are carrying a lot of other major concerns that are much larger than Covid. Overpopulation, destruction of the environment, Climate Change, etc. have been warned about, but for the majority it's not been a REAL part of their life. Day to day things stayed somewhat the same. Covid is by comparison a very minor inconvenience compared to what probably lies ahead. My guess is that those other, far more threatening issues, have just become more real as "normal life" has been disrupted. Our collective everyday reality is irreparably destroyed. The inevitability of those much more devastating issues has taken a step closer to our personal reality. It's one thing to have an intellectual awareness, and another to anticipate with fear what is likely to be inevitable.

I frankly don't see the political will anywhere for this to change. Instead we continue to hear every government on earth talking about growth and increasing GDP. How can you have continued growth when that always means using up more resources? How do you have continued growth in a system (our planet) that is limited?

We can mire ourselves in despair (as many will do) and it will certainly be exacerbated by those who are now facing physical and financial challenges. Or, we can live life each day to the fullest with the knowledge that any one of many scenarios can and will make life for everyone a lot worse at some point in the future.

This time (NOW),for our species, may be the very best of times. Enjoy it while you can. As an "older" person I can validate that many older people often look back at their lives and see times that were probably wonderful, yet they didn't appreciate at that time. Wisdom is far too often hindsight.

We can try to confront that which seems inevitable, but may find ourselves spending our lives angry and frustrated. Alternatively make music, make love, and enjoy what life has to offer now.

All we have is time...decide how you will use it with intelligence and foresight.
You're only as old as you smell
posted on #10
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I’m only on my phone and Dick, Wolfgang and Wade’s replies ring so much truth that I can’t do justice from a 5” touch screen keyboard and will reply with my take as soon as I can.

But those three replies resonate with so many truths and astute observations I feel I could almost write a book!
If you make a mistake, do it again and make it look like you meant to do it!
posted on #11
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Remember back in January when I first heard covid-19. Thought to myself sure we're bound to have a pandemic by now. At my age, you remember most of the major flu outbreaks over the last 50 years. Some much more memorable than others. Got the Asian flu back in the 60s when I was a kid. I remember that one kick my butt.

This is not the first covid virus we have Tangled with it definitely is contagious. We recently had a member of our church which is quite large past with covid. They were in their 50s. Not sure of their overall health.

I am not depressed I know what depression is and have experienced it. Have studied it have a counseling degree. At this point after almost 6 + months more than anything I have been frustrated with the lock downs. I believe the lock downs are nothing more than mass social control. "rules for you and not for me "said Nancy. The worst part is the collateral damage with evictions, job loss stress on relationships excetera. Did I mention School?

My wife works from home I have been very busy this year with my lawn care business. Hey, we're essential. We are so blessed to have our mortgage paid down with little debt. I have a garden in the front yard. So at present there is no financial burden.

I absolutely feel for those that are struggling with this. This is real. My bigger concern is our political chaos in the United States right now. On my radar most days is a socialist coup with our government.
On a side note If any of us die from global warming in the next 20 years please let me know? Which so many of our liberals here holler every day. The ugly part is.
If you are displaced from your home having to live out of a tent, a cardboard box or I camper because you lost your job. Furthermore, because you don't have a job to go back to because the business is closed. This is the serious part of this covid debacle.TIME for us to come back. Have you asked yourself the question when is it actually time that it is safe? Are you waiting for the government to tell you?

This pandemic has been politicized, weaponized. The best medicine you can take for it is to start living. Have you ever driven on 2-85 around Atlanta. This is our ring around the city Expressway. You need a Hummer to feel secure. Everyday is risk with consequences.

If you are a believer in Christ ask the Lord everyday to protect you and your loved ones. Take precautions as with anything.

Even in this lockdown I have joined up with a Christian band at a local church playing contemporary Christian and traditional music. Our future goal for the next five months is to play at venues around the state. We have five vocals, a bass player, a rhythm guitar , electric guitar a violinist and a drummer.

We will get through this. Grow from this learn the necessary steps you need to take in storms like these because it will not be our last. I read my survival manual every morning the Bible. take care Loopers
Edited by GoneUser_200920 on September 17 2020 00:45
posted on #12
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Guys, here's a friendly reminder to stick to our wikiloops code of conduct:

Instead of wasting an interesting thread about how individuals are dealing with the changed situation mentally by bringing about adversity about politics and religious reads, let's not go there.

I'm still thinking about Wades initial contribution to the discussion, which reads like a strong pledge to live life to the fullest in the face of change - that is an interesting concept, and I've been thinking about a potential connection between the looming, rather abstract dangers which we all (? I do stand corrected here by Greg...) know about, and the way we are anticipating the covid situation just like Wade.
Wade mentioned our impact on the worlds ecology and the rather irrational belief in eternal economic growth - and I can confirm that I belong to the group of people who have been living with a feeling of "one day, this will blow up in our faces quite badly" for decades.
I believe Wade is onto something connecting our current experience with what he calls "intellectual fears", and the covid experience changing our feelings towards other emotionally relevant, global issues and our feeling of safety.

Let me offer one idea on how these topics (covid and the lockdown on one hand, and abstract dangers like economic and ecologic outlook since the 1970s) might be connected:

Question is: Why would I feel more scared of, let's say, global warming causing big problems after having witnessed the covid lockdowns?
The connection might be that, while I (and many others) believe the pressing issues of global impact like global warming can only be successfully approached by a united humanity that deliberately changes the economic system away from exploitation,
the lockdown and halted economy during covid would have been a great starting point for a changed economies restart -
yet there are no concepts of that debated on the global scale, and the economic situation of a lot of people is so tight that everybody seems to be calling out to pretty please re-start the old, dirty and eventually crash-bound 18th century economy we've been happily living in.
It is sad to see the chance for a big change being missed, and that experience adds to the darkish feelings of those secretly hoping humanity might still wake up in time.
On a brighter side, I do see some minor attempts to use the economic situation to do away with some rather old fashioned and not eco-friendly businesses - when setting up rescue funds to support certain areas of the economy, the german government is at least discussing not to rescue industries which have not moved towards a more eco-friendly, sustainable approach. That's not much, but at least some folks seem to notice something, whatever they'll do in the end still seems rather cosmetic if you are sincerely worried.

Let's keep this thread interesting & inspiring. Thank you.
posted on #13
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I've just cleaned up some of the rather unpleasant off-topic stuff from this thread so those interested may keep contributing to the initial discussion started by martin.
I'd be interested in Martins response, sounded as if there was something coming ;)
Of course any other users input is appreciated just as well.
Have a nice weekend!
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