Incompetent Lovers
Lyric #3003 by bassMonkey
Tags: Rock n Roll, humour, when sex goes wrong.
Lyrics use permission note:
The free lyrics offered here may be used in the scope of private use.
If you would like to make use of the lyrics in a commercial context, please request permission from the author.
For details, read the Lyric license
The free lyrics offered here may be used in the scope of private use.
If you would like to make use of the lyrics in a commercial context, please request permission from the author.
For details, read the Lyric license

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Posts: 461
Joined: Dec 2, 2020
We do reverse cow-girl and that's alright,
But she's pretty tall so her head hits the light,
The lightbulb shatters and blows out a fuse,
The whole damn apartment loses its juice,
Landlord comes round with a lantern in hand,
He resets the breaker but can't understand,
He says "What the hell has happened in here?"
I say "Buddy, I think it's clear..."
[chorus]
We're incompetent lovers,
Incompetent lovers,
The irony is we're so in to each other,
But it all goes wrong when we're under the covers.
We do the missionary and that's quite good,
But we do it in church like we heard you should,
She pushes too hard on the pew with her back,
So they all topple over like a domino stack,
The priest rushes in with a Bible in hand,
He takes in the scene but he can't understand,
He says "What in God's name is going on here?"
And I say "Father, it's crystal clear..."
[chorus]
We do the wheelbarrow and boy, that's fun,
But we get too excited and we start to run,
Pretty soon after we're out on the street,
Where her mother is the last person we want to meet,
But then she appears with a cake in her hand,
Looks at her daughter but can't understand,
She says "What are you two doing naked out here?"
So I say "Ma'am, let me make it clear..."
[chorus]
Then we try bondage and that's pretty cool,
But of course we forget one important rule,
We remembered the safe word but lost all the keys,
So I spend the weekend chained up on my knees,
Emergency worker with lock-pick in hand,
Seen it all before he can sure understand,
He says "My-oh-my what do we have here?"
"Knock it off Buster it's perfectly clear."
[chorus]
But she's pretty tall so her head hits the light,
The lightbulb shatters and blows out a fuse,
The whole damn apartment loses its juice,
Landlord comes round with a lantern in hand,
He resets the breaker but can't understand,
He says "What the hell has happened in here?"
I say "Buddy, I think it's clear..."
[chorus]
We're incompetent lovers,
Incompetent lovers,
The irony is we're so in to each other,
But it all goes wrong when we're under the covers.
We do the missionary and that's quite good,
But we do it in church like we heard you should,
She pushes too hard on the pew with her back,
So they all topple over like a domino stack,
The priest rushes in with a Bible in hand,
He takes in the scene but he can't understand,
He says "What in God's name is going on here?"
And I say "Father, it's crystal clear..."
[chorus]
We do the wheelbarrow and boy, that's fun,
But we get too excited and we start to run,
Pretty soon after we're out on the street,
Where her mother is the last person we want to meet,
But then she appears with a cake in her hand,
Looks at her daughter but can't understand,
She says "What are you two doing naked out here?"
So I say "Ma'am, let me make it clear..."
[chorus]
Then we try bondage and that's pretty cool,
But of course we forget one important rule,
We remembered the safe word but lost all the keys,
So I spend the weekend chained up on my knees,
Emergency worker with lock-pick in hand,
Seen it all before he can sure understand,
He says "My-oh-my what do we have here?"
"Knock it off Buster it's perfectly clear."
[chorus]
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